49 Reasons Why It's Great To Be A Bloke

49 truly inspired reasons why it is a great thing to be male. Those with a sharp sense of political correctness and not a funny bone in sight, feminists and other such men haters, can skip this one.

  1. A phone conversation lasts 30 seconds
  2. You know useful stuff about tanks and airplanes
  3. A 5 day vacation requires only one suitcase
  4. Bathroom lines are 80% shorter
  5. You can open all your own jars
  6. Old friends don't give you cheek if you've lost or gained weight
  7. When clicking thru the channels you don't have to stop on every shot of someone crying
  8. You don't have to lug a bag of "necessary" items with you everywhere you go.
  9. You can go to the bathroom alone
  10. Your last name stays put
  11. You can leave a hotel room bed unmade
  12. You can kill your own food
  13. The garage is all yours
  14. You get extra credit for the slightest act of thoughtfulness
  15. You see the humor in "Terms of Endearment"
  16. You never have to clean the toilet
  17. You can be showered and ready in 10 minutes
  18. Wedding plans take care of themselves
  19. If someone forgets to invite you to something, they can still be your friend
  20. Your underwear costs $7.50 for a pack of 3
  21. None of your co-workers have the power to make you cry
  22. You don't have to shave below your neck
  23. You don't have to curl up next to some big, hairy guy every night
  24. If you're 34 and single, no one notices
  25. Chocolate is just another snack
  26. You can quietly enjoy a car ride from the passenger seat
  27. Flowers fix everything (or electricians tape)
  28. You never have to worry about other's feelings
  29. Three pair of shoes are more than enough
  30. You can say anything and not worry about what people think
  31. You can whip your shirt off on a hot day
  32. Car mechanics tell you the truth
  33. You don't give a dang if someone doesn't notice your new haircut
  34. You can watch a game in silence for hours without your buddy thinking "He must be mad at me"
  35. One mood, all the time
  36. You can admire Clint Eastwood without having to starve yourself to look like him
  37. Same work........more pay
  38. Grey hair and wrinkles add character
  39. Wedding dress $2000, Tux rental $100 - you do the maths!
  40. You don't care if someone is talking behind your back
  41. You don't pass on the dessert and then mooch off someone else's
  42. If you retain water, it is in a canteen
  43. The remote is yours and yours alone
  44. You need not pretend you're "freshening up" when you go to the bathroom
  45. If you don't call your buddy when you said you would, he won't tell your friends you've changed
  46. If another guy shows up at the party in the same outfit, you might become lifelong mates
  47. The occasional well-rendered belch is practically expected
  48. If something mechanical didn't work, you can bash it with a hammer and throw it across the room
  49. New shoes don't cut, blister, or mangle your feet

If you can think of any more, leave a comment and I'll add it to the list with appropriate credit!

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